“WWE 16 Valentines with 16 Thumb Tattoos” REVIEW

on February 13, 2018 at 9:42 pm

It’s that time of year again! No, I’m not talking about the Road to Wrestlemania, I’m talking about Valentines Day, the holiday that goes from Halloween-lite when your a kid to a soul crushing awareness of being single when you’re an adult. The Halloween-lite phase is pretty great though because not only do you get candy but you also get to collect a bunch of fun Valentines with your favorite TV show characters. Back in my day it was Ninja Turtles and X-Men and for today’s kids it’s Ninja Turtles and Guardians of the Galaxy. What a world we live in!

When browsing through Aldi the other day my wife and I happened to spy another Valentine’s option: WWE thumb wrestling Valentines! A few dollars later we ran back home to unbox them!

The first thing you notice when looking at the box isn’t the poorly timed Dean Ambrose picture or lack of women, but the big warning at the bottom letting you know not to apply it near your eyes. So if you were hoping to put a John Cena temporary tattoo on your eyeball so you can see him all the time, you’ll have to go somewhere else

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Once inside the box you’ll see the mix of half hearted puns and generic Valentines phrases on the cards. Roman’s card says “You Reign Valentine,” but the rest of the Shield is stuck with “Happy Valentine’s Day to you!” and “You are a winner, Valentine!” which would work on any other Valentine’s card set. They couldn’t come up with “I’m Rollin’ in your love, Valentine!” or “I’m a lunatic for your love, Valentine!”?

Let’s be honest though, no one’s buying these for the cards, they’re doing it for thumb wrestling and temporary tattoos! The tattoo image quality ranges from awkwardly cropped in (Sasha) to fantastic (Big E). I did notice one big change though… While there was a Roman Reigns card, there was an AJ Styles tattoo instead of a Roman Reigns one! Was some smark in charge of the tattoos and decided to switch Roman out for AJ? Were they just halfway paying attention and decided to throw any long haired bearded dude out there? I don’t know what the reason was, but Roman’s catchphrase of “One versus All” never fit better.

While the tattoos looked decent (if a little miscolored) when applied, when checking to see if they hold up in battle…

DIRTY DEEDS! Maybe Seth’s tattoo is injury prone or my dry skin just didn’t want to hold the tattoo well enough, but either way I unfortunately can’t recommend this product in my wrestling webcomic/wrestling Valentine’s Day card review blog. I’m sorry. Of course today is Valentine’s Day, so you’ve probably already bought all your Valentines cards or are way, way past the age of buying Valentines cards, but just in case you were thinking of picking these up I’d remember this chilling image:

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Royal Rumble 2018 Predictions!

on January 24, 2018 at 2:56 pm

While Wrestlemania will always be the biggest WWE pay per view of the year, for me the Royal Rumble is always the most exciting. Not only is it focused around two (starting this year) giant matches- breaking up the format of the plethora of WWE’s other forgettable pay per views- it also officially kicks off Wrestlemania season. Let’s take a look at these matches and see who’s going to win!

From last year’s “Remeber the Rumble” ads. I try to remember the excitement going into the Rumble, not the feeling afterwards.

The Usos vs. Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin in a 2 out of 3 falls match for the WWE Smackdown Tag Team Championships
I think Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin have got this one in the bag, not only because of Gable and Benjamin’s in ring work, but also (and mostly) because of Jay Usos’ DUI arrest. I think it’s time for Gable and Benjamin to have their turn as champions though because the division has been revolving around the Usos and The New Day for so long it’s about time someone else had a chance.
Who will win: Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin

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Time to Fix an Old Comic!

on January 19, 2018 at 2:12 pm

I’ve been known to be wrong once or twice with this webcomic, either by stretching the truth too far or making a prediction that turns out to be completely off. Usually these are harmless little mistakes that are easy to write off, however once in a while a mistake so huge is made it deserves to be acknowledged, apologized for, and fixed.

When the WWE’s cruiserweight division was first announced I was sure that Vince would eventually give up on it and just use it as a device to put over whatever monster heel he was high on at that moment- usually either Braun Strowman or Big Show. This was based entirely on my experience watching the demise of WWE’s last cruiserweight championship run where it was treated as a third rate title that eventually was given to a leprechaun as a joke. This time would be the same, I thought. It was a given that those poor 205lbs wrestlers would have their division dismantled through no fault of their own, but only Vince’s lack of interest for anything other than his big boy main eventers. On September 19th, 2016 I posted this comic to show exactly what I meant:

Wow. It’s embarrassing and hard to look at now, but after watching 205 Live from this past Tuesday I will bravely correct my mistake. Without further ado, here is the updated version:

But in my defense, who ever thought Goldust would be the first guy to squash a bunch of cruiserweights?

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