Botched Spot

In my predictions for Battleground I unveiled my fool proof plan for correctly predicting pay per views… and then preceded to do terribly at it! Well, maybe “terribly” isn’t quite accurate. If you’re being technical about the way people won vs. just looking at who won I only got five out of eight matches right. But if you’re a little more lenient about things like Rollins winning by forfeit and Jericho not winning by DQ (as I predicted), I still did pretty good with seven out of eight right. …damn battle royals. ANYWAY, my super secret prediction method is to place your bet on the most obvious, predictable option without considering anything that happened more than two weeks ago. Although it is a little different this time around considering it’s one of the “Big Four” pay per views of the year, as there should be some surprises in store. Let’s see…

The Battle of the Forgotten Paul Heyman guys (minus Rybaxel): RVD vs. Cesaro
As great as Paul Heyman is with Brock and Cena, I feel like he should be plugging Cesaro the whole time. I mean, that’s what he was doing for Brock the whole time he was managing Cesaro. I love Paul and I look forward to (eventually) watching his documentary, but looking at Cesaro from Wrestlemania to now it’s pretty clear that Heyman’s services did nothing for him. And what’s been the point of having RVD back anyway? I predict Cesaro to win because RVD’s been jobbing to the stars for too long to turn around now.

The Midcard Moneymaker Miz vs. Dolph Ziggler
I’ve actually enjoyed the brief feud between these two. I’m glad to see Miz back as a full on cocky, cowardly heel, pulling out all the tricks like mentioning his movie star credentials every chance he gets. I also think he plays well against Ziggler, who is as cool as ever. I think Miz is just at the start of a long Intercontinental Championship reign and will win, but the feud with Ziggler will still stretch on for a while.

The “Chant for Punk NOW” Match: AJ vs. Paige
This is another one of those weird matches where the champion beat the exact same challenger at the last Pay Per View, so it’s not really clear why there is a rematch. Is it just because Paige has been a jerk? Paige has cost AJ two losses now (to Eva Marie no less) so standard booking practice shows that AJ will win. I think both of these women are great wrestlers, but their last match at Battleground was a little lackluster, so I’m hoping they can pull it around this time and put on a better showing.

Bray Wyatt vs. Chris Jericho in a Wyatt Family Banned Match (Except for the Creepy Kid with the Deep Voice)
People complain when Jericho comes back and loses to all of the younger stars, but then they also complained when he won against Wyatt at Battleground. Maybe it was two separate groups of people. Do you ever notice how annoying it is when “people” are painted with the same brush as if we all have the same opinion about everything? I think this feud will keep going on after this match, but I just can’t see how that will happen if Jericho picks up a win again. I guess that means I’m picking Wyatt to win by using either outside interference (maybe Paige will finally debut as Sister Abigail?) or that little kid singing again.

The Flag Match! Jack Swagger vs. Rusev!
I hope this involves Swags and Rusev jousting with their respective flags or fighting with them like broadswords. I’m still enjoying this feud, but I think it’s ending at this pay per view with Rusev picking up the win. Why? Because pretty soon Brock’s taking the title away to his farm in Corn Country and Cena will need someone to feud with. And who has more heat now than Rusev?

The “Will It Actually Happen This Time?” Lumberjack Match featuring Rollins vs. Ambrose
Some were disappointed at the addition of a gimmick to this match, but I think it’ll be great no matter what. The build up between these two men has been amazing and feels very natural. At Battleground I was convinced that Seth Rollins’ push was going on strong for a while, but now I’m not so sure. Ambrose has been getting over really well as a face, and Seth could afford to lose a few matches before he inevitably cashes in his briefcase (proof: Daniel Bryan’s run with the briefcase), so I’m picking Ambrose to win.

The Leader of the Roman Empire vs. The Angry Orange One
Didn’t Reigns just beat the team of Orton and Kane just not that long ago? Yes. Yes he did. Granted, there was a little bit of dissension between the Authority members, but still it’s weird that they had that match like a month before having a singles match with Reigns and Orton. I’m predicting that Reigns will win, but I think the real story behind this match is just how dominant he’ll look in it. This isn’t so much about having Reigns win as it is about building him as the next top guy.

Stephanie McMahon Helmsley vs. Brie Bella
Outside of the last minute addition of “He’s having an affair with a girl fuglier than you!”, this buildup has been pretty well done. There are still so many unknowns – will Triple H interfere? Will Nikki turn heel? Will DBry show up in the crowd for support? Probably no DBry, but that might be for the best to keep this match between the two ladies as much as possible. I’m really torn on the ending here, but I have a feeling that Steph wouldn’t return to the ring after a decade long break just to lose, so I’m picking the Billion Dollar Princess to win.

WWE World Championship Match: John Cena vs. Brock Lesnar (featuring the last appearance of the WWE Championship Title for the rest of 2014!)
At any other show I’d be tempted to pick Cena to win but considering that Summerslam is supposed to be this big network seller, I’m picking Lesnar to win the title. I don’t think he’ll be as dominant as he was at their first encounter and Cena will still look like he has a fighting chance without resorting to weapons. But Lesnar will still whisk the title away to Parts Unknown, his farm in Minnesota (that’s not the actual farm name). I found it reassuring to read Heyman’s thoughts about how it is a good thing to have the World Champion only show up every once in a while. While in my heart of hearts I think it’s kind of a crappy move to have a World Champion who only comes by once in a blue moon, it’s nice to know that someone out there believes in it.

So that’s the biggest party of the summer. It looks like a good show on paper, though other than the main event it feels like it could be just another one of the filler pay per views. I guess the real “big match feel” will come in the matches themselves, whether it’s Brock winning or Reigns decisively kicking Randy’s ass.