How about that Brock Lesnar/ Stone Cold interview, huh? It’s hard to get excited for a match when one of the competitors openly talks about it just being a paycheck. I can’t blame him or judge him for it, but it’s one of those things I’ll wish I hadn’t heard when Michael Cole is trying to sell me on how important this match is Sunday night.

Anyway, after a long hiatus in Pay Per View Predictions, Botched Spot is back! When I first started doing predictions a year or two ago I was pretty good at it, only ever missing one or two matches. My secret was simple- just look ahead to Wrestlemania and pick the wrestlers who I thought would be heavily involved in it to win. Assuming that Rusev was going to face Cena at Wrestlemania 31 made it easy to pick him as a winner of the PPVs leading up to it! This year it’s a little more difficult because the headliners of Wrestlemania 32 are rumored to be guys who hardly ever wrestle anymore- Brock Lesnar, the Undertaker, the Rock, Triple H, Stone Cold (emphasis on RUMORED). With that in mind I’ll do my best to predict the winners of the Devil’s favorite gimmick Pay Per View, “Hell in a Cell”!

Ziggler, Cesaro, and Neville vs. Rusev, Sheamus, and King Barrett

Who will win: The Second Team?

I don’t even know what to say about this match. I hate to see talent like this (not Sheamus) wasted in a preshow match, but when you’ve got all of those call ups from NXT and veterans returning as well, someone’s gotta be in the preshow. Maybe if they brought back the brand split things would be better? Since Tyler Breeze finally debuted on Smackdown by attacking Ziggler, I’m guessing this match will play into that rivalry some more with a little interference courtesy of Cutesville.


Roman Reigns vs. Bray Wyatt in Hell in a Cell
Who will Win: Roman Reigns

It looks like WWE is getting ready for the Roman Mega-Push Round 2, so I can’t imagine Bray winning this one, even with the inevitable interference from the rest of the Wyatts. The fact that Bray can manage to stay over with the crowd despite hardly ever winning anything shows that he should be the one getting all the pushing instead of Roman, but I guess there’s still some honor in being a vehicle to debut a new hoss like Brawn Strowman.


Seth Rollins vs. Kane (if Demon Kane loses, Corporate Kane is fired from being the Director of Operations)

Who will win: Kane… by disqualification.

This is the biggest set up for a DQ finish I’ve ever seen! Seth keeps his title, Kane keeps his job, and the WWE status quo stays the same. I don’t hate Kane as a person or character, but having him constantly switching between being a joke character and a legitimate threat (like challenging for the title during Bryan’s brief title run after Wrestlemania 30) really kills any suspension of disbelief that he might actually win.


Charlotte vs. Nikki Bella

Who will win: Nikki

As sick as I am of the Bellas, I can easily see how WWE would rather have a heel Nikki feud with (the amazing) Sasha Banks, especially with how they had Brie mockingly lead a “we want Sasha” chant a few weeks ago on Raw. I really liked Charlotte on NXT when she was a dominant badass and the woman to beat, but now that she’s been called up she’s not showing a lot of personality other than almost crying during promos.


The New Day vs. the Dudleys

Who will win: The Dudley Boyz

This feud’s been great so far, and I think the only way it can continue is if the Dudleys finally win the titles. Normally I’m all against older wrestlers beating younger ones, especially for titles, but since the Dudleys are wrestling consistently and put other wrestlers over (unlike The Rock, Triple H, Brock Lesnar, etc.), I think they would bring a lot to the titles as champions. If New Day won the titles back at TLC in the match the Dudley Boyz made famous it would be even better.


Kevin Owens vs. Ryback for the Intercontinental Championship

Who will win: Kevin Owens

Kevin Owens is awesome and I love the way he makes fun of Ryback’s self help books, so I’m hoping he wins. I don’t have much else to go on other than that.


Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar in Hell in a Cell

Who will win: Brock Lesnar

While I could see this going either way, I’m giving the prediction to Lesnar here because rumor has it that he’ll face the Rock at Wrestlemania, and I think keeping Brock looking strong for that is going to be the most important thing to the WWE. I don’t expect much to be made out of the cage stipulation, but as long as Taker can keep his boot away from Lesnar’s nuts I won’t complain.


John Cena vs. TBD

Who will win: TBD

It’s no secret that Cena is due for a big vacation right after Hell in a Cell, so more likely than not he’ll be dropping the title to his challenger. But who will that be? I’m going out on a limb and saying Daniel Bryan. I know, it’s a dreamer’s pick, but according to him he’s ready to go any time now. I think he’s one of the few people who could pick up the slack from Cena leaving and while I don’t think it will help Raw’s major ratings problems, it will make Raw way more fun to watch. Whoever wins the title, I hope they keep up the weekly US Title challenge. I think it’s done a lot to distinguish the title from being a second place midcard title.

So that’s it for “Hell in a Cell”! To be honest, I can’t say I’m looking forward to any of these matches, other than The New Day vs. the Dudley Boyz. This whole PPV is built around one match- Taker vs. Lesnar- but, much like Brock, I’m over it. Part of it is that I’m not a huge Undertaker or Lesnar fan and part of it is that I have trouble believing that Lesnar wouldn’t completely destroy Undertaker, an older guy who’s had numerous health issues. I won’t deny that the crowd will love it, but it’s just not for me. I am curious to see who answers Cena’s challenge though. More realistic options are Dean Ambrose or even Heath Slater (given all the buzz he’s trying to generate), but if it’s Braun Stowman I’m boycotting Raw. Or at least complaining about it on Twitter.