There’s been a lot of talk about WWE aping their Daniel Bryan anti Authority feud with a new Roman Reigns anti Authority feud. It makes so much more sense with Bryan because you can just look at him and see that he’s not what the WWE typically look for in a superstar. Roman Reigns on the other hand looks like he fell out of a poster. I will say this for the WWE, by putting Roman in a feud with Sheamus they can guarantee that I won’t cheer for Roman’s opponent at TLC. I mean, I won’t cheer for Roman either, but it’s at least something.
Survivor Series! One of the “big four” pay per views! I attended last year’s Survivor Series and really enjoyed the event. The WWE had found a great way to incorporate the main storyline going through Raw and Smackdown (the Authority being jerks) into a traditional Survivor Series elimination match. Unfortunately this year is a return to their normal pay per view format with only one traditional Survivor Series match that doesn’t even have the participants announced yet. I am a fan of tournaments though, and I’m excited to see how the WWE Title Tournament shakes out, even though it seems obvious who the final two competitors in it will be. Let’s see what Survivor Series has in store for us:
Dolph Ziggler vs. Tyler Breeze
Who will win: Tyler Breeze
Speaking of last year’s Survivor Series, Dolph was the star of the show. Not just like he had a great performance, but he was actually booked as the guy who defeated the Authority! Now? He’s losing to Tyler Breeze in a barely hyped singles match. He was in a rough spot after the whole Summer/Rusev/Lana storyline fell through, and Breeze is great and all, but I think Ziggler deserves to have something a little more developed than this. His recent comment about being done with wrestling in two years makes me think that he’ll be losing this match… and a lot of others.
Charlotte vs. Paige for the Diva’s Championship
Who will win: Charlotte
This match has become more about Paige insulting Charlotte’s brother than it is about the title. Paige’s line about Reid didn’t bother me as much as it did some people because, if nothing else, it gives Charlotte a reason to want to kill Paige. Up until this point Paige has been kind of a nuisance, but nothing more than that. Of course her insult doesn’t make her any more of a threat to Charlotte.
The Brothers of Destruction vs. The Wyatt Family
Who will win: The Brothers of Destruction
This prediction is pretty easy to pick. I mean it’s not like this whole week on the Network has been dedicated to Bray Wyatt! While I don’t know who will be officially participating in the match for the Wyatts (I’m guessing Bray and Braun), I’m sure all of them will get a shot in on Undertaker and Kane, and then get soundly trounced by the Brothers. I originally hoped that it would be a four on four match with Undertaker and Kane finding two allies to help against the Wyatts, but now I realize that anyone else would get completely overshadowed by ‘Taker. Not a good way for Finn Balor or Baron Corbin to debut.
World Title Series Tournament for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship
Who will win: Roman Reigns
That’s right, I’m going for the safe bet. I’m fairly confident in picking Ambrose and Reigns to face off in the finals of the tournament, and I think Roman will beat Dean to win it. A lot of this is based on backstage reports for, oh, about the last two years or so that said that Roman will win the title. I don’t think there’s any way that Ambrose will win cleanly without turning heel, and while he may earn the gold through joining the Authority, I don’t think the WWE want Roman feuding with someone who’s ten times more over than he is.
That being said, I expect Sheamus to come out and attack Roman for the title (possibly with the help of the Authority), setting up a new feud for Reigns. I just don’t see the Celtic Warrior walking out with the big gold belt however. If Sheamus cashes in his Money in the Bank briefcase right after Roman wins the title it will leave Roman with a one minute long title run- not too impressive for WWE’s next poster boy. Sheamus could also cash in by adding himself to the final match of the tournament and win, but I think that would be too close to the finish of Wrestlemania 31, making it more about Roman’s bad luck when it comes to the Money in the Bank briefcase than anything else. Since I’ve accepted that Roman will win (and honestly I prefer it to Sheamus) I can say that I’m interested to see how everything plays out and who he will feud with for the title.
So that’s Survivor Series 2015! While I’m disappointed by the lack of a traditional elimination match, I think the tournament makes up for it. I think most of it looks pretty good on paper, and if I am wrong and Ambrose turns on Reigns and joins the Authority, I’ll be marking out hard. If not and Roman wins, I’ll still be totally okay with it.
How about that Brock Lesnar/ Stone Cold interview, huh? It’s hard to get excited for a match when one of the competitors openly talks about it just being a paycheck. I can’t blame him or judge him for it, but it’s one of those things I’ll wish I hadn’t heard when Michael Cole is trying to sell me on how important this match is Sunday night.
Anyway, after a long hiatus in Pay Per View Predictions, Botched Spot is back! When I first started doing predictions a year or two ago I was pretty good at it, only ever missing one or two matches. My secret was simple- just look ahead to Wrestlemania and pick the wrestlers who I thought would be heavily involved in it to win. Assuming that Rusev was going to face Cena at Wrestlemania 31 made it easy to pick him as a winner of the PPVs leading up to it! This year it’s a little more difficult because the headliners of Wrestlemania 32 are rumored to be guys who hardly ever wrestle anymore- Brock Lesnar, the Undertaker, the Rock, Triple H, Stone Cold (emphasis on RUMORED). With that in mind I’ll do my best to predict the winners of the Devil’s favorite gimmick Pay Per View, “Hell in a Cell”!
Ziggler, Cesaro, and Neville vs. Rusev, Sheamus, and King Barrett
Who will win: The Second Team?
I don’t even know what to say about this match. I hate to see talent like this (not Sheamus) wasted in a preshow match, but when you’ve got all of those call ups from NXT and veterans returning as well, someone’s gotta be in the preshow. Maybe if they brought back the brand split things would be better? Since Tyler Breeze finally debuted on Smackdown by attacking Ziggler, I’m guessing this match will play into that rivalry some more with a little interference courtesy of Cutesville.
Roman Reigns vs. Bray Wyatt in Hell in a Cell
Who will Win: Roman Reigns
It looks like WWE is getting ready for the Roman Mega-Push Round 2, so I can’t imagine Bray winning this one, even with the inevitable interference from the rest of the Wyatts. The fact that Bray can manage to stay over with the crowd despite hardly ever winning anything shows that he should be the one getting all the pushing instead of Roman, but I guess there’s still some honor in being a vehicle to debut a new hoss like Brawn Strowman.
Seth Rollins vs. Kane (if Demon Kane loses, Corporate Kane is fired from being the Director of Operations)
Who will win: Kane… by disqualification.
This is the biggest set up for a DQ finish I’ve ever seen! Seth keeps his title, Kane keeps his job, and the WWE status quo stays the same. I don’t hate Kane as a person or character, but having him constantly switching between being a joke character and a legitimate threat (like challenging for the title during Bryan’s brief title run after Wrestlemania 30) really kills any suspension of disbelief that he might actually win.
Charlotte vs. Nikki Bella
Who will win: Nikki
As sick as I am of the Bellas, I can easily see how WWE would rather have a heel Nikki feud with (the amazing) Sasha Banks, especially with how they had Brie mockingly lead a “we want Sasha” chant a few weeks ago on Raw. I really liked Charlotte on NXT when she was a dominant badass and the woman to beat, but now that she’s been called up she’s not showing a lot of personality other than almost crying during promos.
The New Day vs. the Dudleys
Who will win: The Dudley Boyz
This feud’s been great so far, and I think the only way it can continue is if the Dudleys finally win the titles. Normally I’m all against older wrestlers beating younger ones, especially for titles, but since the Dudleys are wrestling consistently and put other wrestlers over (unlike The Rock, Triple H, Brock Lesnar, etc.), I think they would bring a lot to the titles as champions. If New Day won the titles back at TLC in the match the Dudley Boyz made famous it would be even better.
Kevin Owens vs. Ryback for the Intercontinental Championship
Who will win: Kevin Owens
Kevin Owens is awesome and I love the way he makes fun of Ryback’s self help books, so I’m hoping he wins. I don’t have much else to go on other than that.
Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar in Hell in a Cell
Who will win: Brock Lesnar
While I could see this going either way, I’m giving the prediction to Lesnar here because rumor has it that he’ll face the Rock at Wrestlemania, and I think keeping Brock looking strong for that is going to be the most important thing to the WWE. I don’t expect much to be made out of the cage stipulation, but as long as Taker can keep his boot away from Lesnar’s nuts I won’t complain.
John Cena vs. TBD
Who will win: TBD
It’s no secret that Cena is due for a big vacation right after Hell in a Cell, so more likely than not he’ll be dropping the title to his challenger. But who will that be? I’m going out on a limb and saying Daniel Bryan. I know, it’s a dreamer’s pick, but according to him he’s ready to go any time now. I think he’s one of the few people who could pick up the slack from Cena leaving and while I don’t think it will help Raw’s major ratings problems, it will make Raw way more fun to watch. Whoever wins the title, I hope they keep up the weekly US Title challenge. I think it’s done a lot to distinguish the title from being a second place midcard title.
So that’s it for “Hell in a Cell”! To be honest, I can’t say I’m looking forward to any of these matches, other than The New Day vs. the Dudley Boyz. This whole PPV is built around one match- Taker vs. Lesnar- but, much like Brock, I’m over it. Part of it is that I’m not a huge Undertaker or Lesnar fan and part of it is that I have trouble believing that Lesnar wouldn’t completely destroy Undertaker, an older guy who’s had numerous health issues. I won’t deny that the crowd will love it, but it’s just not for me. I am curious to see who answers Cena’s challenge though. More realistic options are Dean Ambrose or even Heath Slater (given all the buzz he’s trying to generate), but if it’s Braun Stowman I’m boycotting Raw. Or at least complaining about it on Twitter.
Here it is, the final book of “A Viper in Mizville” (click here to view) I’ll be honest with you all, when I first though of this idea a few weeks ago it seemed like a silly little idea that would be good for a quick laugh. Now that I look at the 30+ page document (granted, the font size is huge and I re-printed pictures in the back so people can cut them out if they want) I feel a little… proud? I hope Randy Orton appreciates it anyway. Like I said in my first post, this is my first attempt at game writing, so if it’s terrible, y’know, just understand that it came from a place of caring. Also if you play it let me know in the comments! And if you have any questions I’ll be happy to answer them! Also, the reason I’m sharing it through Google Drive is because WordPress doesn’t allow large enough file size uploads, so the images would look terrible.
And just remember, if you’re not Orton… You’re Ort-out! …I think that’s the new official catchphrase for Randy Orton Week.
The Adventure in this particular RKOPG takes place in Mizville, a village plagued by an evil villainous overlord, The Miz! Well, Miz might not be evil, but no one wants him there and they definitely don’t want him in power. As Randy Orton travels through the world of Mizville he will discover that Miz was handpicked to be the ruler of this land… but a few others are hoping to overthrow him!
Mizville is home to:
- Randy’s Tour Bus: Randy Orton’s trusty steed that takes him wherever he needs to go! Of course he can mostly get around Mizville by walking. Orton can rest here to fill half of his total hit points.
- Inn: The inn is a bit small with only four rooms, but the Ortons can bunk up together. Staying here costs 5 gold and restores all of Orton’s health. They also have a free continental breakfast with bear claws! If you’re feeling sneaky and the innkeeper’s not looking, you could probably stash an extra bear claw in your inventory to refill 5 whole hit points while on your journey!
- The Drinkin’ Hole: What RKOPG would be complete without a tavern to catch the latest news, gossip, and a bite to eat? At The Drinkin’ Hole, you’ll find all sorts of Old Timers, Smarks, and plain ol’ villagers who mostly want to mind their own business… but will fight if provoked! It’s said that a large man with an insatiable appetite comes by here every night and eats their entire supply of food!
- Security Booth(s): Located throughout Mizville is an ample supply of Security Booths! You’ll find one or two Security Guards lingering about these locations, charged with keeping the piece in Mizville.
- Ol’ Bill’s Tools ‘N Such: This hardware shop is manned by a grizzled Old Timer named Bill. He often regales Orton with stories of his past wrestling life, mostly about how much harder wrestling used to be. When Orton buys a weapon Bill mentions how in his day all wrestlers needed for a weapon was to pretend they had a roll of quarters in their hand.
- Kendo Stick: Lightweight yet obnoxious to those who get smacked with it, the Kendo Stick is a quick way to get extra damage in! Adds +2 points of damage to each attack. One time use only. 5 gold.
- Folding Chair: Much more portable compared to carrying around an announce table chair, plus it adds +4 points of damage per attack! Can only be used for one encounter. 20 gold.
- Arm Cast: It’s like a shield, except it really only defends a small portion of your body. So you might as well bash people with it. Adds +2 points of damage to each attack (+4 points if you can convince 4 different townspeople to sign it). Permanently stays with the wrestler. 25 gold.
- Ladder: Perfect for rescuing kittens or cleaning gutters. If you cared about such things! Chuck this at enemies to add +5 points of damage to each attack. Can only be used for one encounter. 35 gold.
- Table: You never know when you need to put someone through a table, so be prepared and buy one! Using the table with a successful body roll causes 10pts of damage. One time use only. 30 gold
- Spanish Announce Table: You want to do ultimate damage, so you need the ultimate table. Be sure to let everyone know what the Spanish Announcers would be saying now if you hadn’t taken their table as you carry this around town. Using the table with a successful Body roll causes 20 points of damage. One time use only. 60 gold.
- Sandra’s House of Kickin’ Ring Gear: The local Apparel shop is just the place to outfit your Orton with some classy gear! Just don’t ask the shop keep for last-minute tailoring, or she’ll sass you but good.
- Towel: It’s the most effective if it’s the only apparel in use. Adds a +5 modifier to any Charisma rolls, +10 if it’s the only gear equipped. 15 gold.
- Elbow pads: For protectin’ elbows! Adds +5 to Health. 20 gold.
- Kick pads: Shin splints? More like shin KICKS amirite? Adds +3 to Body. 30 gold.
- Magic Duffel Bag: Do you want that folding chair, that ladder, and that chair, but don’t have enough hands or willing accomplices or jobbers to help carry them? Use this item and gain 5 slots to your inventory! (Now with less poop!) 40 gold.
- Happy Herbie’s Happy Herbies: The Herbal Store is manned by a hippie named Sterling, who’s overly enthusiastic and helpful. If Orton buys anything or talks to Sterling, they mention that they have another secret stash of purchasable items that hasn’t been approved yet by the FDA (but it’s only a matter of time).
- Normal Supplies:
- Health Shake: You’ve taken a beating, so get to eating! Or drinking, rather. Cuz it’s a shake. Restore 5 points to your total health. 10 gold.
- Restore Health Shake: Really low on health? This wondrous shake fills your health back up to the max! 20 gold.
- Protein Shake: Pump yourself up with protein! Drinking this shake grants a permanent +2 points boost to Body! Limit 1 purchase per day per Orton. 10 gold.
- Fish Oil Shake: Fish oil provides all sorts of healthy benefits, and you look super smart for taking supplements with it. Which is why this shake gives you a permanent +2 points boost to Mind! Limit 1 purchase per day per Orton. 10 gold.
- Orange Shake: Filled with the power of a thousand fallen oranges, this shake boosts your Charisma with an extra +2 points permanently! Limit 1 purchase per day per Orton. 10 gold.
- Bushel of kale: It’s just kale. 5 gold.
- Secret Stash:
- Synthetic Pot: It’s okay, it’s synthetic! Reusable up to 5 times to refill your health by 10 points, but you lose 5 points of Mind for some reason while carrying it. 15 gold.
- Pot Brownies: They’re super tasty! You’ll really have to get the recipe one of these days. Till then, use these to restore 5 points of Health back to the entire party, or as a distraction to any common enemy you don’t feel like fighting. Limit 1 purchase per day per Orton, as Sterling didn’t bake that many. 15 gold.
- IED Enhancer: You’re constantly running into battles, why wouldn’t you want to enhance your IED for that extra intermittent edge? Increase your damage by 5 points on all rolls! Limit 1 per Orton. One time use per encounter. 25 gold.
- Orton Growth Hormone: The real deal! Just don’t let the officials know you have this! Permanently increase all stats by 5 points, including max Health! Limit 1 per Orton. 60 gold.
- Normal Supplies:
- Spray Tan Salon: If Orton goes in for a spray tan, he gains +3 to his Charisma modifier for the rest of the day!
- Wrestling School: A hive for Old Timers, Smarks, and Indy Wrestlers, Orton can probably find some quick random encounter fights here if he finds himself in the need for some fast gold! If a wrestling class is in session and your Orton is feeling extra saucy, you can try to challenge the teacher to a match!
- Arena: Unless there is an event going on as dictated by the story or a random encounter, the arena is empty, save for 2 guards posted at the door and 1 janitor inside. If Orton searches through the arena he will find an infinite amount of folding chairs and 1 ladder. If Orton wants to take any of the weapons he will have to sneak past the guards and janitor, or at least subdue them in some way.
- The Miz School of Future Nobodies: Previously known as Truman Elementary, the school was renamed after Miz came into power. Supposedly, a loyal, determined fellow who hustles a lot has been known to linger about the place, handing out t-shirts and balloons and accepting all challenges, so long as they don’t interfere with his schedule.
- TV Studio: The local TV studio airs news of the town twice a day and records various MizTV segments 34 times a day. Orton can offer his services as a guest weatherman. If he succeeds at Weathering, he’ll be rewarded for his efforts with 30 gold and a free Kendo Stick (with the studio’s logo on it) once per day!
- Temple of Creative: Legend has it from the townspeople that the temple has been responsible for selecting their next leader for generations. Truthfully, it’s been in the control of a terrible wizard known as Vince McManz for some time. Nestled near the Spooky Forest Full of Spiders, Orton should tread carefully here.
- Miz Manor: The residence of Mizville’s mayor is large, glamourous, and overly extravagant considering the town is in a recession.
- Spooky Forest Full of Spiders: It’s SPOOOOOOOKY!
And today’s Orton reveal is High Elf Wizard Orton! Teleporting in from a land of magic and mystery, High Elf Wizard Randy Orton is ready to battle with his most powerful spells! He may not be the strongest Orton in the galaxy, but he more than makes up for it with his ability to attack multiple opponents or make them run away!
Life in Mizville is hard and dangerous, but fortunately Orton is well equipped to handle it! Much like the adventuring discussed yesterday, all combat is controlled with the simple roll of a d20. As you may have noticed on the character cards like the one featured below, there is a helpful table that tells you what your d20 roll equates to in damage points. So for the “Viper” Randy Orton, rolling a “4” would equal 3 damage, a “9” would be 4 damage, a “13” would be 5 damage and a “16” would be 7 damage. It’s pretty easy if you keep the character card handy. The opposite is also true for the opponents, only the GM rolls for them.
Several of the Ortons and their opponents have their own abilities and effects that come into play. For example, the Viper Randy Orton has an ability where he poisons opponents if he hits them due to an attack roll of 10 or higher. When poisoned, opponents are dealt two points of damage at the end of their turn (after they attack). Likewise, some opponents have their own abilities that come into play during combat. The Legendary Adventurer Ryback, for example, gets 1 point of health back after he attacks, thanks to his “Feed Me More” Special Effect. When two of these abilities come into conflict, like if Ryback is poisoned at two health after an attack, and you don’t know which effect comes into play first, use Orton’s first. Why? Because it’s his goddamn game, that’s why!
Of course combat (and life) with Randy Orton would mean nothing without RKOs, right? RKOs are controlled with a different kind of die. A special die. A RKO die. Each Orton starts out with 4 six sided RKO dice that can be rolled for a chance to RKO an opponent. When a player decides he’s had enough of someone, he can attempt to RKO by rolling all of his RKO dice at once. If he manages to get at least one of each letter, Randy successfully hits them with a RKO! If the roll fails it will initiate combat unless you can talk your way out of it.
Four RKO dice may not seem like much to start with, but as you progress through your adventure you’ll be able to get more through certain items or as rewards from the GM for roleplaying Randy Orton accurately or just being creative and funny. Above is a printable template for an RKO dice. If you’re boring (or don’t have a printer!) you can also use a normal six sided die, just treat rolls of 1 and 2 as a “R”, 3 and 4 as a “K”, and 5 and 6 as an “O”.